My today morning started with a picture message a simple funny one but it had picture of resuscitation which was fine but my experience with it took me somewhere else. The train of thoughts and memory began running and disturbing me for few hrs..
It was 17 oct evening i remember exactly now, when my brother came running to me saying neighbours calling me their granny not feeling well. Being in a small town and living in a small colony whole neighborhood is knitted like a family, and the old lady was like a grand mother for us too even we called her dadi ( grand mom ) only.
Well doubting the worst I ran to their house as few days back only when I went to see her, I doubted her health and on symptoms which she was telling me I strongly recommend her to go to cardiologist or physician , but she said she lived her life and it’s her age of being victim of different diseases therefore don’t want to spend money on doctors and trouble her family.
It was her call what could I say , yet i tried my best to counsel her about the worst outcomes if she stay with her decision, but u can always counsel man who is afraid of death or life but never a one who has no will of living and is content with it..
Well back on track, when I reached there I found her sitting on chair with mouth open , eye closed..My heart sank I checked her vitals quickly, no pulsation in radial artery, pupil dilated. I turned numb assuming cardiac arrest and her death from it. But any how collecting my self I ask her daughter-in-law standing near by since how long she is lying like this ? She said just two mins back she was talking to them. I without giving a second thought , checked her carotid artery where there was slight jugular vein pulsation avoiding my seniors practical advice never to give it an attention in old age, I started giving her CPR and mouth to mouth resuscitation, she was my own how can I gave up without trying. She took two short breaths during my trying to resuscitate her which I gave for 10-15 mins with all my energy. I got a hope I shouted her family to react fast and call ambulance.
But it turn out they called me to declare death and not to try to rescue her, I was asking running here and there to act fast. Meantime someone called near by another doctor and he gave the answer they wanted to know, of course why would he try hard on stranger old lady..
Yes practically her chances of survival were least even if acted on time. But young blood failing to accept death practically, felt foolish on trying to turn it away.. I was shocked how elder people ( her son , daughter in law, husband, old senior doctor) accept death so soon and we younger one ( me and her grand child who came later with teared eyes at my door asking I tried all measures to save her na ?) less feared from death , yet how hard we try to beat it and fail to accept it at once…
With time and age acceptance for few things and maturity how to deal with them come no doubt in that now…